Welcome to a new feature here at Football for Normal Girls: At the Water Cooler, a one-sentence(ish) highlight from each NFL game over the weekend (plus a preview of Monday night’s game). Just enough information to help you through any water cooler/grocery store/dinner table football conversation!
Here’s what you need to know about Week 1:
Denver Broncos vs. Baltimore Ravens (Broncos won, 49-27)
If there were any doubts that Peyton Manning is back and better than ever in his second year post-surgeries with the Broncos, his record-tying seven (SEVEN) touchdowns on Thursday night’s opener against the Ravens quieted them.
Buffalo Bills vs. New England Patriots (Patriots won, 23-21)
Buffalo would have won this game were it not for earning 10 penalties for a whopping 75 yards – it was the mistakes that killed them, not lack of ability to win the game.
Chicago Bears vs. Cincinnati Bengals (Chicago won, 24-21)
It’s been said that more NFL games are lost than won and that was certainly the case with the Bengals on Sunday, who gave up a big lead late in the second half to lose to the Bears, who actually didn’t look too shabby in their first game under rookie head coach Marc Trestman.
Cleveland Browns vs. Miami Dolphins (Miami won, 23-10)
Sorry, Browns fans. I was wrong.
Detroit Lions vs. Minnesota Vikings (Lions won, 34-24)
The story of the game for me is from the reigning league MVP, Vikings running back Adrian Peterson, who ran in a 78-yard touchdown…on his first carry. He wasn’t much of a factor for the rest of the game, but what a way to start the season.
Indianapolis Colts vs. Oakland Raiders (Colts won, 21-17)
This game should have been a blowout, but the Colts needed to return to their 2012 ways as the comeback kids to win this one and start the season 1-0.
New Orleans Saints vs. Atlanta Falcons (New Orleans won, 23-17)
Welcome back, Sean Payton! And holy passing attack, NFC South: Saints QB Drew Brees and Falcons QB Matt Ryan combined for nearly 700 passing yards and 4 touchdowns.
New York Jets vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Jets won, 18-17)
There likely isn’t a guy in the NFL who feels worse waking up this morning than Tampa Bay linebacker Lavonte David, who had a late hit on Jets QB Geno Smith which gave the Jets easy field goal position for the win in the final seconds of the 4th quarter.
Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Tennessee Titans (Titans won, 16-9)
This one was all ugly. But despite their only offensive score not coming until the 4th quarter, the ugliest part for the Steelers was losing center Maurkice Pounce, who may have a torn ACL.
Carolina Panthers vs. Seattle Seahawks (Seattle won, 12-7)
A win’s a win, but it was a little surprisingly to see everyone’s #1 pick, Seattle, struggle to win this one in Carolina.
Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Kansas City Chiefs (Kansas City won, 28-2)
Even if NFL Europe doesn’t take off and the Jaguars don’t move overseas, Jacksonville may vote them off the
island peninsula after scoring zero offensive points in their home opener on Sunday.
(Confused about why the Jaguars didn’t score any offensive points and yet still scored 2-points? That’s a safety, a defensive score, and you can read all about it in this post.)
St Louis Rams vs. Arizona Cardinals (Rams won, 27-24)
The Cardinals may have lost (another one of those games lost rather than won), but Larry Fitzgerald is one happy wide receiver: he finally has a dependable quarterback (Carson Palmer) who shows off what Fitzgerald is really capable of – 2 touchdowns on the day, for starters.
San Francisco 49ers vs. Green Bay Packers (49ers won, 34-28)
I said it all offseason and I’ll probably say it all of this season: Anquan Boldin, new 49ers wide receiver acquired from the Ravens, was the best move of the offseason.
Dallas Cowboys vs. New York Giants (Cowboys won, 36-31)
At the end of the first half Giants head coach Tom Coughlin reportedly told his team that he had never seen a worse half of football…which is probably because he hadn’t seen the second half yet (or because he missed last year’s Jets at Cardinals game).
Washington Redskins vs. Philadelphia Eagles (Monday night, 7:10pm EST)
You might want to do a few jumping jacks to get warmed up before this one. It promises to be wild, blazingly fast ride.
San Diego Chargers vs. Houston Texans (Monday night, 10:20pm EST)
You might be ok to go to bed before this one gets started. It promises to be a fairly easy win by the Texans (sorry, San Diego).
How did you all make out this weekend? Any highlights that weren’t covered here?